When politicos around the state climb into Santa’s lap, what do they ask the jolly old elf to bring them? Elves around the state eavesdropped and passed the wishes along for us.
Top Ten Christmas Wishes in Alabama Politics
10. Joe Reed… oh please, oh please… a Jim Folsom for Governor campaign.
9. Upstate legislators want earplugs so as not to hear the cry for coastal insurance reform from downstate.
8. Paul Hubbert wants Santa to bring a hatchet he can bury with Bradley Byrne. Though he’s being cagey on where he’ll bury it.
7. Ron Sparks wants to “… be a winner, too!”
6. Ethics Commission? Subpoena power.
5. Alabama wants the Air Force to have the biggest and best tanker we can build.
4. Hank Erwin… oh please, oh please… a Jim Folsom for Governor campaign.
3. National Dems hope Santa could bring them Alabama Blue Dogs that are a little less dog and a little more blue.
2. Kay Ivey… a campaign schedule that is slightly less PACT.
1. Bill Johnson wants… well… we have no idea what he wants. Seriously. Santa doesn’t know. Nobody knows.
Want more? Keep reading!
Second Ten Christmas Wishes in Alabama Politics
20. Alabama legislators want a really, really big wallet to carry those large, foam board checks.
19. State Republicans? Ethics reform. Or another year beating Dems about the head with it. A win either way.
18. Alabama’s children tell Santa a little peace on earth and good will towards all is needed. And please, Santa, toilet paper and soap at school. New textbooks, maybe?
17. Tim James wants Santa to deliver him as the Right candidate
16. Once again, Herman Thomas has not been good and gets only a paddle. Which, once again, kinda works out okay.
|Thousands turn out in Montgomery in support of Roy Moore and his Ten Commandments monument in August 2003.|
15. Artur Davis wishes Santa Claus would bring a little sense of inevitability to the state Democratic establishment.
14. Roy Moore wants to party like it’s
1999 er… 2003.
13. Paragon… a telephone number and website so maybe people will just shut the %@!! up about it.
12. Those who provide kickbacks want a Birmingham mayor who will be in office long enough for the check to clear.
11. Les Phillip? How about the $36k that the Mike Huckabee fundraiser cost him?
Many thanks to those around the state who helped with the list, including J.N., reader D., and other elves!
Actually we have a few more…
Bill Johnson wants a wedgie from Bob Riley. Apparently.
Seth Hammett… soft ride into a beautiful sunset.
Nine gubernatorial candidates hope Santa brings them a promise of change of address in 2011.
Birmingham city bookkeeper would like a little help with all the paperwork every time the mayor changes.
Donors to the Governor’s Circle? R.O.I., and that means seats, baby.
State Legislators? A big ol’ Magic Budget Genie.
Ron Sparks wants a little touch-up paint to strike the “Lt” in all those “Sparks for Lt Gov” signs.
Birmingham News wants Santa to bring handkerchiefs for wiping the egg off their faces if their 2010 polls are as bad as their 2006 polls.
Tea partiers want Santa to bring them reminders about why they were so quiet about the debt when Bush was president.
Luther Strange wants a new tennis racket – that he will be able to enjoy after the campaign.
Troy King hopes Santa brings the state some stingy bingo machines and big lawsuit verdicts so he’ll have ample campaign funds.
Roy Moore wants Santa to bring him a can of Chuck Norris whoop-assTM he can open on his GOP challengers.
A big ol’ dumpster for the big ol’ Constitution.
Regina Benjamin: couldn’t a Surgeon General have a Surgeon Army with at least a few Surgeon Majors, Colonels, and Privates?
Patrick Cooper wants a Birmingham mayor whose name does not ring a Bell.
Robert Bentley wants a little name ID.
Independent candidates? Some respect for running based on conviction.
Alabama’s voters hope Santa brings candidates to pick from instead of settle for.
Merry Christmas! I hope the holidays bring you good things.